Are People Really Dumb Enough To Be Fighting Over What Color Santa Is?

Reports of a major mall hiring a black Santa has brought out the morons.  They are using precious oxygen to yell, "SANTA IS WHITE".

Can we start with the fact that Santa is not real. He's not white, nor black, nor plastic, nor made of fairy wings. He's NOT REAL. Now let's get to the "character" of Santa.

I got news for you kids. If you really want to get historical on this, Santa Claus was based on a 4th Century Greek Bishop.  Greeks are known for their "olive" colored skin. You know that means?  Santa was neither black NOR white.  Neither.  The look of the Santa you know and love was developed by the Coca-Cola company. Theres no historical pride, or causation heritage here to celebrate, he was popularized by a soda company.

It is time to hook electrical charges up to the internet and start frying the shit out of the computers of the ignorant who want to make issues out of nonsense like this. My only hope is that these people are so damn stupid that they'll accidentally stab themselves or fall off a cliff taking a picture. We just don't need this kind of dumb around.