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Frank Pain

Hey, I'm the dude you hear on the radio and see all over Facebook. I'm married with 2 kids and more pets than the city law allows. I have lots of tattoos and make people cry on a daily basis, aka Shay Hill. My wife makes my lunch every day and I typically drink more coffee than Juan Valdez. My back hurts.
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Frank Pain Issues Video Response to Rolling Stone Magazine’s Decision to Feature Boston Bomber on Cover [NSFW]

So Rolling Stone magazine recently defended their decision to feature Boston Bomber, Dzhokhar Tsarnaev, citing it was within their tradition of serious and thoughtful coverage.

You know, they have every right to do whatever they want on and in their magazine.

That right was afforded them by the great nation we live in...America!

This great nation also afforded me the right to respond to the offensive cover in my own, legal way.

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Category: The Morning After
Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images
Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images
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Westboro Baptist Church Misspells Illiterate on Flyer Accusing Americans of Being Illiterate

We've all heard the saying about the pot calling the kettle black. Well, apparently the people at Westboro Baptist Church haven't. In a recent flyer promoting a WBC protest, the church gang accuse Americans of being illiterate. The problem is that they misspelled the word "illiterate".

Apparently, WBC hates spell check as well.

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The Average American Drank Over 300 Beers Last Year – Pain’s Beer Blog

What is the "Beer Institute"? Well, according to their website, they "represent the $246.5 billion beer industry. An industry that includes more than 2,800 breweries and 2 million jobs."

What does that mean? You got me. Maybe that means they like beer as much as I do.

Well, regardless, they recently released the findings of research into the consumption of beer in America. According to said research, the average American drank just over 300 beers last year.

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Nine Inch Nails’ Video for “Came Back Haunted” May Cause Seizures

What do you get when you combine director David Lynch with Nine Inch Nails? A video that may cause seizures.

Recently released, the video opens with a warning/disclaimer that reads:
WARNING: This video has been identified by Epilepsy Action to potentially trigger seizures for people with photosensitive epilepsy. Viewer discretion is advised.

 
So, if you're prone to seizures, considered yourself warned. This video is killer.

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Painman Images
Painman Images
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Here’s the Creamiest, Most Delicious Chicken Fettuccine Alfredo Recipe Ever

All those that know me know I love to cook as much as I love to eat. Being married to an Italian definitely has its perks at the dinner table, but this redneck can definitely cook the best Chicken Fettuccine Alfredo you'll ever eat.

Best of all, it's super easy to prepare. So, that's what we're preparing on this round of Cooking With the Painman.

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Category: The Morning After
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Baby Seal Gets Eaten by Shark in the Most Hilarious “Discovery Channel: Shark Week” Promo Ever

Discovery Channel's "Shark Week" is the most exciting week in television...in my opinion. Simply put, it's a full week of nothing but sharks.

This year, "Shark Week" premieres on Sunday, August 4th at 8pm (central).

The hype surrounding "Shark Week" is almost as epic as the hype around the McRib. In anticipation of this year's "Shark Week", Discovery Channel has released the most hilarious video promoting the week.

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Here’s How to Reuse a Penis-Shaped Cake Pan…if You Actually Want to Reuse It

How many times have you seen a load of gals out for a bachelorette party and many (if not all) sucking on straws in the shape of a penis? It seems penis shaped novelties are fairly common in the bachelorette party circuit...even penis shaped cakes.

How do you make a penis shaped cake? Well, with a penis-shaped cake pan, of course.

Once the party is over and all that frosting covered penis cake is gone, what do you do with the cake pan? Well, you can store it until the next bachelorette party, or you can use it for other cakes.

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Comedian Tim Minchin Sings Most Hilarious Song About Prejudice You’ll Ever Hear

There are words in the English language that you just don't say without being considered prejudiced. There are words about ethnic groups that are considered prejudice that you shouldn't say, even if you're joking. Some people say these words because they hear people from that group say them and think it's OK. Well, it's not.

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Hilarious Video of Drive-Thru Workers Pranked by Headless Driver

There's nothing more fun that getting a good laugh at someone else's expense. Most of the time, that involves a prank. Heck, playing pranks on our friends have been around since the beginning of time.

According to Youtube, prank videos have surged over the past few years.

You may have seen older videos of people pranking drive-thru workers. Well, the newest drive-thru video has emerged. This time, a ghost isn't driving the car, it's a headless person.

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Category: Entertainment, Funny
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Home Run Hits Woman in Face

Baseball fans dream of the chance of catching a home run when they go to a big league ballgame. Well, during the 7th inning of the Tuesday night game between the Cardinals and Diamondbacks, one young couple had that opportunity. What happened when they got their opportunity will make you wince then leave you laughing.

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