Careful: Stupid People And Dangerous Drivers In Lubbock This Weekend
I have this theory and in fact, I think it’s more fact that theory, and that’s a fact. What? Okay, anyways here goes: The reason drivers are so bad in Lubbock is that they are from all the surrounding small towns where they don’t get much excuse for what we call “traffic”. Expanding on that theory and/or fact: during the weekends, Lubbock is overwhelmed with people visiting from small towns who are doing their shopping, therefore the driving conditions are even worse. More after the jump.
Now, let’s add all these people “coming to town for dry goods” to the fact that the rodeo is in town and you have a recipie for a sh!tkickerpalooza! Yep, thousands upon thousands of rubes driving willy nilly through the big city with little to know driving experience outside of a tractor or a game of Gran Turismo. They’ll be taking pictures with their cell phones while making lefts from the right hand lane and rolling through stop signs with a corn dog from the mall in one hand. I expect that we will be flooded with Jim-Bobs and Sally-Anns all headed to Lubbock because of the nice weather. Careful, they are liable to stop in the middle of the road for anything, usually to run around the car a couple of times and change drivers (they don’t realize their small town fun can result in multiple vehicular homicides her in the Hub). And before I sign off, let me warn you about the worst of them all: ANY VEHICLE WITH NEW MEXICO PLATES IS A ROLLING DEADLY WEAPON. I’ve seen better drivers at Putt-Putt than I have in New Mexico. Anyways, enjoy a safe and sunny weekend and if you can, stay off the road!