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Why Your Metal Sucks And Is Dead

Yeah, I get it…I’m too “old”, I don’t “understand”.  Well, I’m going to go with “you’re too young” and you have no sense of perspective.  The problem with today’s metal is, I’ve heard it all before and it hasn’t improved.

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Sorry kids, I’ve heard all of your riffs. I heard them on albums from Black Sabbath, U.F.O., Iron Maiden, Pantera and Metallica.  What makes yours different?  Your guy screams over the riffs instead of singing?  Well that would be a great idea if it was one guys “thing” but when it’s everybody’s, it’s just a lazy approach to music.  I got news for you too, your entire scene is about to disappear.

I was talking to a record promoter the other day and he was talking about a popular band that was rush releasing a “non screaming” version of their new song. He told me the days of what I call “Cookie Monster Metal” are over.  He said the labels are dumping the bands and the bands themselves are getting tired of playing to the same 300 person (and dwindling) crowds in every town.  It’s not like we at a station haven’t tried to support this scene here and there either.  When we brought the biggest of the big, Lamb of Godo town the turn out for that one was pitiful too.

I know this is rough news to hear if you’re a fan, but new wave died, punk died, and many other small scenes have come and gone.  There will still be some bands out there, but for the most part, this scene is over. I thought the death knell was when a six year old school performed a death metal song on America’s Got Talent.  Some people thought it was “neat”.  I thought, if a six year old could do my job, I’d feel like a really big tool.  I also know that you’re going to want to pass this around and start the name calling, but before you get mad at the messenger, go call your friends out for not going to shows, not buying t-shirts and not buying the albums.

I, for one, am pumped because every time a scene like this dies, a new one rises up.  Some bands have already made the transition (All That Remains, Asking Alexandria and even to a degree Motionless in White). I love HEAVY music, I just want it to have a little more creativity than a guy screaming over recycled guitar riffs. The writing is on the wall for metal bands, learn to sing and write songs or pack it up.

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