Five Simple Steps To Being Less Dickish At The Supermarket

Okay, I'm not asking you to go out of your way to be a great human here, just asking you to be less of a jerk.  There are things that A LOT of people do at the grocery store that are very inconsiderate and we're going to take a look  at some of them now.

5. Return your damn shopping cart. It's not just "somebody else's job", stray shopping carts can lead to parking problems, scratched cars and worst of all, NO SHOPPING CARTS when you get in the store.  C'mon, your fat ass can walk 20 feet to the cart corral.

4. If you notice something doesn't have a price tag, try to get one that does. This isn't real tough folks. I doubt you buy anything that you don't know the price of, and if you didn't see a tag on your item, you know you're going to have a problem at the checkout line.

3. Return unwanted items to where you got them. I'm not going to get all hippie on you here, but there's two levels of this to consider.  One, when you put a can back in the wrong place or some bread near the cereal, you cost us all money because some person has to restock it. Next, to you ass bags that will leave meat somewhere it doesn't belong, keep in mind, something DIED so that a human could eat. The least you could do is put that stuff back where it has a chance of being consumed.

2. There is no "wait while me or the family get something" while you're being checked out. This one aggravates the piss out of me.  Once you're in line, you're done shopping. That's it.  The rules of "not being being a dick" clearly state you can't hold up the line while people keep bringing stuff to you.

1. Do not abuse the self-check or express lanes in anyway.  Now, there's a deeper level to this one, but it's just a dick move to take 21 items to the 20 item lane (since when is 20 items "express" anyways?).  This should also include NO ITEMS THAT REQUIRE ADDITIONAL SERVICE.  Let me explain, in the "quick" isle, the cashier shouldn't have to go get smokes, card you for booze, or price check an item.  You may dispute me on this one, but while it is not wrong, and in many cases perfectly acceptable, it is still a little "dickish" to do something in a line that is meant for speedy service.

So there you have it. My *BIG* five no-no's at the supermarket.  I plan on this being a series covering, Xmas, online and other topics.  Before we move onto other topics, l welcome your comments on this one. Let's here your objections and additions!

If nothing else, here's a cartoon to watch.