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crimebeat - Page 4

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RockShow Threesome: Chinese Nut Crushing Death Grip

Wow, I always knew kicking or grabbing somebody's junk would get their attention.  I had no idea that it could involve fatalities.  Can you just imagine having your giggle-berries squeezed until you passed out and died?  Jeez, that's gotta suck.  The story after the jump.

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RockShow Threesome: Don’t Ever, Ever Mistake Your Girlfriend For A Hog

Hunters like the one in our story give other hunters a bad name.  I would think in the top two or three rules of hunting would be one that says something like "don't shoot at something if you don't know what it is".  Wouldn't you agree that would be a good hunting 'rule of thumb'?  Yeah, now that we're in agreement click through for the fun.

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RockShow Threesome: The Dangers Of Eating Sushi Include Butt Worms

I taught myself to like sushi.  Now that I like sushi comes the "threats" that come with eating sushi.  You could literally eat yourself retarded or end up with a giant worm coming out of one or more of your holes.  More after the jump.

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RockShow Threesome: Man Posts Crimes On Facebook Plus CHAINSAW TO THE THROAT!

Hey what's worse that putting pictures of your crimes on Facebook?  Committing crimes against the POLICE and putting the pictures on Facebook.  Yes technology is allowing us a whole new class of dumbass criminals.  More after the jump.

 

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RockShow Threesome: The Great Columbian Whore Debate

Well our secret service has stepped into it.  They found themselves having a good time with some Colombian hookers putting themselves in a tight spot (both literally and figuratively).  The question at hand is, how big of a 'breach of trust' is this?  Does it open them up for blackmail or just make them stupid?  We get into it on this one next:

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RockShow Threesome: German Man Tries To Flee From Sex Crazed Woman! [AUDIO]

"Hooking up" is a dangerous thing. Have you every thought about all of the billions of things that could go wrong as part of or as a result of your 'one night stand'.  You could catch a disease, you could get murdered, and you could run into a crazy person who won't let you stop having sex.  More after the jump.

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RockShow Threesome: Naked Freezing Frat Guys Found In Basement [AUDIO]

Frat-bags do the dumbest thing. If you told me you were going to tape me to a bunch of other naked dudes, i'd tell you 'laterz'.  For some reason these prospective douche bags not only took it, they wouldn't help the police.  This and more fun after the jump.

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RockShow Threesome: Heathen’s Kids Are Filthy Damn Chocolate Faced Liars [AUDIO]

Kids, they're cute so we don't beat them.  Seriously, kids are like little miniature savages just waiting for you to turn your back so they can mess stuff up.  Heathen's kids are...uh...heathens.  This is a pretty funny story, check it out and two other bonus pieces of RockShow audio after the jump.

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RockShow Threesome: Easter Bunny Arrested For Drugs, Ugly Woman Punchs Boyfriend And One Testicle Makes A Break For It! [AUDIO]

Here comes Peter Cottontail,

Wobbling down the bunny trail

Hippity Hoppitty ...jeez is it hot here, I'm feeling woozy

Yes kids, the Easter Bunny is just your neighborhood drug dealer.  Click through f0r the story plus to other bonus bits of audio you can't live without.

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RockShow Threesome: Vacuums Should Not Be Substituted For Siphons Or Autosucks [AUDIO]

Oh we have serious fun for you today! We also have serious advice, that may actually help you to not blow yourself up. You see blowing yourself up can be painful and on occasions even deadly. Don't blow yourself up. Listen to today's story's.

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RockShow Threesome: Who’s Face Would You Like To Wipe Your Rear With? [AUDIO]

Okay, I know some of you are hoping for pictures of ex-husbands and ex-wives, but think a little more global and a little more historical.  Even better, think a little more creative.  There's a new toilet paper coming out guaranteed to bring out the creative side of wiping your chili maker!

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RockShow Threesome: Will Have Sex For Two Cheeseburgers And Forty Bucks! [AUDIO]

Some offers are just too good to be true.  There there are offers like this one that are too true to be good.  Can you just imagine the woman that would do you after she scarfed down two cheeseburgers?  My guess is this isn't what you'd call a "high-class" prostitute.  More after the break.

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