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“The Eagle” Could Have Been Great [REVIEW]

I’ve mentioned many times before that I’ll watch anything with swords in it. I, in fact, end up liking most of it too. “The Eagle” was not so much.  You probably remember the t.v. commercials.  A Roman soldier and his slave go to find a gold standard (the thing that sits on top of a flag pole) that his fathers troops lost two decades earlier.  What made the t.v. commercials interesting was when they ran into the “seal people” (a bunch of people that looked a little like Native Americans but painted head to toe in blue).  More after the jump.

YouTube

Channing Tatum stars in “The Eagle” and he’s the current “yummy” of the month for a lot of ladies.  The first thing that threw me about the movie is that no one in the movie even tries to have any type of accent.  The all just speak like Americans until they run into those blue British bastards “the seal people” who speak their own language.  I never really realized how important just a little accent could be in sucking you into a “period piece” like this.  The next thing that sucks about the film is the promised master/slave to slave/master turnaround isn’t really explored.  Add to that the almost magical reappearance of “help” when it comes time to fight the Smurfs…uh, I mean “Seal People”.

The frustrating thing about the move is that you feel like it could have been good, but for some reason everybody is just taking a pay check.  It’s like even the great Donald Sutherland phones it in.  I don’t really “rate” movies except for those in the suspense or horror genre (I feel like I have a good grasp of the genre).  In lieu of a rating, I’ll tell you that I feel asleep twice, and even though it was free on one of my “on demand” channels, I still felt ripped off.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nmiee-4PQJI

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