In this life, it's important to have goals. And my primary one, my "main quest" if you will, is to eat my way through IHOP's Addams Family-inspired menu.

That's ridiculous, you say. To which I would say, of course it is, but these are my warm fuzzy memories with my beloved mother, and so-help-me we are leaving our next outing together with purple food-dyed teeth.

My mom was/is/will always be the Morticia to my Wednesday. She has always loved dark, goth and spooky things. I'm just the next one to run with the torch of darkness. The next weirdo in a long line of weirdos.

My mother and I understand each other, and we enjoy each other's company immensely. She's an incredibly open-minded and loving person, and if any scene in cinema history is "her," it's Morticia in Addams Family Values sympathizing with a Debbie that's about to kill her, because, What about Debbie? Everyone needs validation and love, even if they are a psychopath that's currently trying to electrocute your whole family.

So mom, when you read this, because you're so supportive and will read this, the next trip to IHOP is on me.