Mask-shamers? Seriously, do people not have anything better to do?

I give zero snots for what other people think of my health choices. Unfortunately, I'm a big guy, and bullies go after softer targets than me. If you or yours need a snappy comeback, I have you hooked up.

If someone has some kind of problem with your mask and you care to even acknowledge them, drop one of these lines (then kick them in the balls or lady balls).

  1. Have you looked in the mirror? Maybe YOU should be covering YOUR face
  2. I wear a mask for the same reason I wear a condom with your mom: I don’t want to catch anything.
  3. Why do you want to see my lips? We aren’t even dating.
  4. Oh, you have an opinion on my life? Which one of my bills will you be paying?
  5. My mask keeps germs from falling out of my mouth. Maybe you should wear one to keep the bullsh*t from falling out of yours.
  6. Hey, they say milk is good for your teeth. So is minding your own business.
  7. If you change your mind about wearing a mask yourself, consider using a thong, because they’re the best for covering up a-holes.