Things That Should Be Illegal in Lubbock (But Aren’t)

Living in Lubbock builds character. Unfortunately, it also exposes you to a lot of things that feel illegal…but somehow aren’t.

First of all, the wind. Not just “a little breezy”. Nope. I’m talking about the kind of wind that ruins your hair, steals your receipt, and tries to rip your car door off its hinges. At some point, it stops being weather and starts feeling very personal.

Let’s talk about seeing someone you know every single time you leave your house. Grocery store? Yep. Gas station? Of course. The one day you look terrible? That’s when you run into everyone. Especially the one that got away. Fabulous. You're wearing Cookie Monster jam-jam pants. I'm sure he's just dying to have you back...

Dust storms showing up out of nowhere should absolutely be regulated. One minute it’s sunny, the next minute you’re in a low-budget apocalypse movie, gripping the steering wheel like it’s your last day on Earth.

Also, car washes during the windy season. Why are we even pretending this is a good idea? You pay money just to immediately get sandblasted back to square one. I'm calling BS on it all while the carwash guys are cramming cash in their pockets! Maybe I should reconsider my career path, now that I think about it...

And finally, thinking you can “just run one quick errand.” That’s not how this works. It’s never one stop. It’s never quick. Somehow, it turns into a full-blown experience. Facebook post and all. There is no such thing as a "quick errand" in Lubbock, Texas.

None of this is technically illegal—but in Lubbock, it probably should be.

Keep scrolling for more silly Lubbock fun in the galleries below!