Ten People in Lubbock Who Will Be Left Behind After The Rapture

Well, folks, if the rapture really does happen, we've gotta be honest with ourselves: not everyone in Lubbock is getting sucked up into heaven. A few of us are just destined to stay behind to do important things like argue over beans in chili and which restaurant in town has the best queso. It is what it is.

Instead of sitting around sulking about eternal damnation, I've got a feeling that the unlucky. unchosen few would actually throw a surprisingly kickass party. You know the type of people they are—shameless, loud, with a high likelihood their fridges are already stocked with cruddy, cheap beer.

Check out 10 people in Lubbock who would, without a doubt, 100%, be left behind.

...And I, for one, am stoked for the festivities...

Ten People in Lubbock Who Would 100% Be Left Behind After The Rapture

We aren't all headed for those pearly gates, and that means more tamales to go around at our apocalypse party!

Gallery Credit: Chrissy

In closing, being left behind probably isn't the outcome you were hoping for, but at least in Lubbock, we ALL know how to make the best out of a bad situation. So, if the sky opens up and you hear angels shouting out a roll-call, don't forget, the real fun might actually be the afterparty right here in town. It's BYOB, BYOT (tamales), and this rager is going to last until the end of time.

Happy Rapture to you, and good luck! (Don't forget to wear panties, too! It'll be impossible for us to ignore seeing your no-nos while we wave goodbye...)

Keep scrolling for more ridiculous stuff like this in the galleries below...