Before being arrested, and then subsequently dying in a Texas prison, Sandy Jenkins loved the (much) finer things in life. Like Armani, Hermès, and Gucci finer things.

That's why he attempted to hide gold bars and watches worth tens of thousands of dollars in and around Lady Bird Lake after he knew the heat was on. Imagine being a jogger who lucked upon one of those baubles before the police arrived.

But how did this man- whom people referred to as "quiet" and "zero personality" manage to pull off such a massive fraud and earn the nickname "Fruitcake" amongst his social betters?

It's Going To Be A Movie Soon

If you'd rather wait for the movie Fruitcake, I understand. It's going to star Jennifer Garner as Sandy's wife Kay and, in perhaps a stroke of casting genius, professional wrestler/award-winning actor Paul Walter Hauser as Sandy.

The movie is based on the brilliant and hilarious Texas Monthly article Just Desserts. It's a long and delicious read about Sandy, Kay, and the snotty, gossipy Old Wealth society of Corsicana, Texas from which the Jenkins so desperately wished to belong.

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Embezzler Extraordinaire Or Just Lack of Oversight?

Sandy began working at the Collin Street Bakery in Corsicana, Texas at a pivotal time in the company's growth. Collin Street Bakery found extreme success in their mail-order business, as fruit cakes' high salt content makes them virtually shelf stable. Additionally, the company made wise decisions- investing in its supply chain to lower costs.

However, Sandy was brought in to replace a husband and wife accounting team that had done the finances old school for decades. Sandy implemented a computer program to modernize how the company handled its finances. He used the same program to cut checks to his credit card company, too. Weirdly, no one seemed to notice for years.

During that time, Sandy embezzled nearly 17 million dollars, which he spent on shoes, watches, fine wine, and his wife.  Kay would go on to serve only probation for her role in the embezzlement- which was keeping her mouth shut and spending money. Some folks think Kay got a pretty good deal, even if she was ostracized by that society she wanted to be in so badly.

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Sandy was eventually fired on the suspicion that he was embezzling after a new employee started asking questions about massive checks written to credit card companies. After being fired, Sandy attempted to flee, first to Austin, then to Santa Fe.

The FBI descended on Corsicana, and the Jenkin's estate sale was probably one of the best ever held in Texas. I wish I could have been there to ogle the Louis Vuitton, Marc Jacobs, and Balenciaga.

Maybe 10 years for $17 million wouldn't have been such a bad trade, if Sandy had lived to see the outside again. Still, I doubt he would have still wanted to hear his affluent "friends" call him "Fruitcake" one more time.