Why The Texas Accent is Really an Evil Superpower

I didn't realize how thick my accent was until I spent some time out of state at summer camp as a kid. I also wasn't aware that my accent made me seem stupid to other people. I was embarrassed at being corrected by other kids, or constantly giggled at for saying "y'all".

It wasn't until I got a little older that I realized a Texas accent is a superpower.

Think about it.

We can confuse and disarm others with a well-placed "bless your heart" and it might just be a secret weapon in negotiation.

There's something about our accent that screams "comfort" to those around us and makes them put their guard down. "I'll getcha a glass of sweet tea, hun.." could bring a bad man to his knees when you're actually tossing in a bit of poison in his glass. They're expecting you to serve them up a plate of brisket with a kiss! They'd never see it coming...

It's unassuming.

They think we're just a tad slow, but the cogs are turning...

A person with a thick Texas accent has the ability to command an audience with a strong "Howdy!" in that laid-back, warm drawl. People sit up straighter when they enter the room and wait for what will come out of their mouths next. They don't seem to realize that Texan might be there to rob the place. They've already charmed everyone around them into loving them.

The right amount of twang and warmth in your voice could allow you to get away with some sinister stuff. Of course, you wouldn't do any of that. You know what you've got. That being said, let's keep it under wraps. You never know when that dang'ole thang will come in clutch.

That's just my two cents. Carry on.