Item At Walmart Takes Things A Step Too Far

There's always that one guy, or that one company that takes things a bit too far.

I love bacon. I put bacon in my Chinese Fried Rice. I eat double helpings of deep-fried bacon at Golden Corral. I have pre-cooked microwave back and some bacon ends and pieces just for cooking. That's a lot of bacon love. Still, I cannot love this:

The website describes it as having "a sweet and savory bacon goodness". First off, let's not use the word "goodness" as this product clearly comes to tempt us from hell. Second, bacon does have a certain amount of sweetness to it, but I can't imagine it being taken a step further than usual. Lastly, there's the texture. Most bacon folk like their stuff crispy, the thought of it in jelly form just seems a little repulsive to me.

Anyways, that's me. Maybe it'll be the best thing you've ever tasted. Order some up here or find it on the shelf of the Walmart at 4th and Slide.