There is a particular meme/post going around that's driving me nuts.

I don't have a dog in the Johnny Depp/Amber Heard trial. The consensus is that she is a very nasty woman, but I'll let the judge decide. What we are here to discuss today is, how people will take elements of the information that comes out and use it wrongly.

If you haven't seen the post (it's in it's entirety below) it's the one that says:

"...we've learned that a woman can..."

and then it goes on to list all of the horrible things Amber Heard is accused of doing. Then, it goes on to use a similar device to give a listing of un-horrible things a man can do and still be caught up in this mess.

The problem with this framing device is that it comes off like it was written by the He-Man woman haters club. This is a list of things that Heard is accused of doing (especially when grouped together), and a listing of what Depp has done. Just because these celebrities have behaved in this manner does not mean that all women or all men behave this way and that they always get away with it. The fact is, this could have been two men, or two women, so it shouldn't be an indictment of either gender.

It's true that in society we tend to favor the word of women over men when it comes to abuse. Men who are abused are expected to take violence and walk away because that's the "manly" thing to do. I'm also certain there have been many instances where no one would ever believe that the man was the one on the receiving end of the violence. This brings us to our conclusion.

The problem with this meme is that it makes the false conclusion that the woman is always seen as right and the man is always seen as wrong and tries to flip it 180, where the man is always right and the woman is always wrong.

So you didn't learn anything about men and women watching this trial. You learned about one couple, and if you're smart, you learned that domestic violence works both ways and you shouldn't judge until all the facts are in.

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