Yet Another Reason Texas Is Inherently Superior To Colorado

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I'm happy to admit right away that I am extremely biased about Texas. I grew up here, I live here and I truly feel that it has a beautiful culture that is unmatched anywhere in the world.

I'm also happy to admit that I have a bias against Colorado. I lost many friends to cities in Colorado after Austin became an unaffordable and un-hip option for smaller-town Texans who wanted a Big City life.

Does Colorado have some advantages over Texas? Absolutely. Natural beauty is seemingly everywhere, cannabis is legal, there are plenty of amenities, and more. It has lots of issues, too, that I won't get into here because I want to focus on one crime against humanity in particular:

Eight dollars for chips, mild salsa, and hot sauce? Why? Why would you do this? Do they charge $4 for water with cloudy ice and half a lemon?

We know that 8 oz is a cup and 4 oz is half a cup. Pathetic. I want enough hot salsa for 3-4 birds to take a bath in and I want it served in a neon green plastic molcajete too. I'll use hot sauce on my tacos, thank you.

And since I'm from Texas, I know that chips and salsa are almost always endless, and quite often they are free. When they are not free they are rarely 8 dang dollars. Because chips and salsa are quite literally the official state snack of Texas. And that's beautiful. Say what you want about Texas, but we are very hospitable folks.

So if you are considering making the seemingly chic move from Texas to Colorado, I encourage you to consider what all you'll miss: cowboy boots as formal wear, people patiently waiting to hold the door open for you, being called sweetie and darling by a stranger at the grocery store, and of course, free chips and salsa.